Women and the Church

One of the things that came up a lot in conversation and in particular one night at Momentum was the issue of women in leadership. There was a ministry call for women who were hurt/angry/disillusioned because they felt that they had a God given call over their lives, but people had told them they couldn’t pursue it cos they were women. Or had felt in theory they had the permission as it were, but no investment, encouragement, mentoring etc to make the theory a reality, so were still getting nowhere.

The response was huge. On one level it was good, but another one of the speakers summed it up when she said “I kinda thought we’d come further along than that”. Evidently there’s still some way to go. And lots to discover.

Times are a changing though. This was the first time I’d seen the speaker’s lounge not only filled with coffees, pastries and papers, but also children’s books and toys. And it felt good; we didn’t have a ministry and a life – it was all life, mingled in together.
I had many conversations with women leaders where we talked about what leadership looked like in the different phases of life. Leadership as a single woman, as a married woman, as a mum. We’re just working it out as we go along, hoping not to make too many mistakes!!!

I think I got lucky with the whole women in leadership thing, because its been a rare occasion that anybody has suggested I shouldn’t be in church leadership on account of my gender ( Maybe other reasons..!). Also going to a church like St Tom’s helped massively since Mike and Sally and the rest of the team were always very encouraging.

But it’s still something I work through, look at, especially since Tia, but also with Baby 2 on the way. When is the right thing to stay at home with the family and when is it right to get on the platform, say yes to that speaking invite? You get all these prophecies and things in your twenties, these God moments when you get a glimpse of what you are on earth for. You dream dreams and make plans. And then a few years later you try to apply that vision to a very different landscape. You try to work out where it fits with changing nappies, feeding, family routines, managing a home and sorting out your laundry! Not so clear cut now, is it?

For me, it seems to be a bit of pendulum thing. There are seasons where the home is the primary focus of activity and others when the church stuff steps up a gear. At those times, we’re learning how to make sure that life and responsibility does not fly out the window! At Momentum, Chris’ parents and sisters came to Shepton Mallet and looked after Tia while I was working. And it felt like it worked all round.

The pendulum thing works well in that I don’t get stuck in the rut of doing church stuff and speaking for speaking’s sake, for the sake of recognition and approval. I get to retreat into everyday reality. I have time and space to live out my calling in broader ways. Like in my local community with the other moms, or in my church. So far things are working, and whilst it can get complicated at times working out what to do, its all feels part of “life in all its fullness”.

My hope is that in the years to come that we the church will get further along the path as it were when it comes to women. Far enough along to be an example to our culture, the world around us. Salt and Light you know, that sort of thing. In empowering women, in finding creative ways to release women to discover all their God given potential. My hope is that the paths are not so narrow that women find themselves having to fit into masculine models/existing models of leadership and calling, but are free to bring what they have to the table. And free to do it in a way and at a pace that acknowledges that calling is not just doing stuff upfront, or just found in a job title, career or a “ministry”, but is found in a life, which includes the unpredictability of everyday living. My hope for Christian women like those that night at Momentum is that they have the courage of their convictions to pursue their calling, whatever it may be.